REVIEW: Hot by Julia Harper

Hot (2008) by Julia Harper, pub­lished by Grand Cen­tral pub­lish­ing, is a roman­tic comedy slash roman­tic sus­pense paper­back, $6.99 US. This is Ms. Harper’s first con­tem­po­rary novel set in Wis­con­sin. Here is the book’s description:

For four years, play-by-the-rules bank teller Turner Hast­ings has brooded over her uncle’s wrong­ful impris­on­ment. But when two bum­bling crooks stum­ble into her branch (barely dis­guised in Yoda and Sponge Bob masks) and hold up the place, she sees a chance to do some­thing she’s never thought pos­si­ble: get revenge. She takes advan­tage of the melee to pull a heist of her own, seiz­ing info from a secu­rity box that will exon­er­ate her uncle.Sent to inves­ti­gate a bank rob­bery in small town Wis­con­sin, Spe­cial Agent John MacK­in­non dis­cov­ers the rob­bers were two not-quite-so-bright thugs and one woman. Now, Turner is on the run. With SA MacK­in­non on her trail, she’s break­ing into the bank pres­i­dent Calvin’s house, kid­nap­ping his Great Dane, and for the first time in her life, set­ting out to break a few rules. But when Calvin hires a hit-​man, MacK­in­non will have to decide between his career — and saving Turner.

My thoughts are that most read­ers will find this story fun. Most of the comic relief is to be found with Yoda and Sponge Bob and most of the col­or­ful people who make up this rural Wis­con­sin town. As for the char­ac­ters, they are pretty much pre­dictable start­ing with Turner Hast­ings. She’s in her early thir­ties, single with one broken engage­ment behind her.

Being the local librarian, Turner has led a boring life until the bank rob­bery. She has decided to break the rules and steals the safety deposit box of bank pres­i­dent, Calvin Hyman. Her motive seems to be vig­i­lante justice.

Her favorite uncle was fingered by Calvin for embez­zling money from the bank four years ago and he died before the matter ever went to trial. So, Turner spends most of the book as a fugi­tive seek­ing evi­dence against Calvin Hyman that will clear her uncle’s good name.

Calvin Hyman is a man who grew up poor and with no prospects. His revenge was becom­ing a successful busi­ness­man right in his own home­town of Winosha. Being mayor, bank pres­i­dent and school board member, he’s look­ing for a state seat. How­ever, with Turner steal­ing his safety deposit box, she poses a threat to his polit­i­cal career. With the pri­maries two weeks away, Calvin decides to hire a con­tract killer to remove the threat to his polit­i­cal ambitions.

Fed­eral agents John MacK­in­non and Dante Torelli are assigned the bank rob­bery case and drive down to Wash­burn County to inves­ti­gate. The two men are rivals and that seems pretty much forced. Come to find out, the rivalry between the men only serves to resolve an important plot point later in the book. Moving on. John is forty years old, divorced with a six­teen year old daugh­ter he hasn’t spoken to in three years. Much of his per­sonal life branches off into a separate thread with a res­o­lu­tion that was a bit, dare I say it, pre­dictable and resolved a bit too neatly.

Then there’s the romance where John and Turner develop most of their rela­tion­ship over the cell phone. The two share sexy, witty banter back and forth while he pur­sues her. Turner has her hang-​ups with men; John fears being alone. The two don’t actu­ally meet face to face until the last 1/4th of the novel. John acts bla­tantly unpro­fes­sional as a fed­eral agent assigned to uphold the law. He takes up her cause, has sex with her and is able to use his polit­i­cal con­nec­tions to exon­er­ate her of all charges. Their hap­pily ever after for me was joined with uncertainty.

The book did have it’s share of comedic moments but it’s not enough to save this book. Also, the plot was rather thin and the romance didn’t work for me as I am not fond of long dis­tance rela­tion­ships. The story is embedded with dozens of cliches and there was noth­ing plausible to this story. I can’t believe that the FBI could not capture one woman and two idiots in a small rural town. The fact that they eluded the police for more than a day is laugh­able and incred­u­lous. John did act unpro­fes­sional and should have been rep­ri­manded but he wasn’t. Turner Hast­ings should have been arrested for theftbut she wasn’t. The two bum­bling idiots get a “Fugi­tive” type ending[they escape en route to prison] that means that they won’t face jus­tice either and or free to prob­a­bly stum­ble into another book by Ms. Harper (she said tongue in cheek).

Anyway, if fun is all you’re after then HOT by Julia Harper will give you that. I think some dis­cern­ing readers will probably be dis­ap­pointed. I didn’t hate the book but I don’t do light and fluff. If you don’t care for the h/h spend­ing a lot of time apart then you’ll be dis­ap­pointed. Color me sur­prised to learn that Yoda and Sponge Bob war­ranted a chap­ter or three with dia­logue straight out of a Bill and Ted movie. A lot of the slap­stick and silliness was absurd.

Also, I didn’t like the fact that Ms. Harper allowed law abid­ing citizens to take jus­tice into their own hands with­out the cor­re­spond­ing con­se­quences but what fun would that be? This novel’s goal was aiming more for “fun” without any regard to ”reality” and that just doesn’t work for me but it may work for you. My grade, an unen­thu­si­as­tic C. 

Tech­no­rati Tags: Julia Harper, Con­tem­po­rary Romance Review, Revenge

Tagged as: bank robbery, FBI, Julia Harper, Romantic comedy